FYI

5 Ways the Sticky Faith Cohort Is Still Changing Our Church (3 Years Later)

Shares Oct 29, 2014 Fuller Youth Institute

This Sticky Faith Story is from Matthew Deprez, Intergenerational Pastor at Frontline Community Church in Grand Rapids, MI, a Sticky Faith Cohort veteran, and one of our Coaches and Sticky Faith Trainers.

Our church had the privilege of participating in a Sticky Faith Cohort in 2011. When I think back on all the decisions Frontline has made over the past 3 years, the decision to join the cohort has been, without a doubt, one of the most important. Here are some ways the Cohort is still changing our church:

1. We formed a new network

One of the most unexpected parts of the cohort is the ongoing relationship Frontline has been able to build with other churches who have been part of cohorts. Three years later, some of my closest friends in ministry are leaders from other churches we met that year. I’ve been challenged by how to do ministry from churches with under 200 people, and churches as large as 10,000+ people. Some of our most effective changes have happened because of ongoing conversations since the cohort ended. 

2.Programmatic shifts

Our ministry programs today look completely different from before the cohort. Earlier this year, we finished building a brand-new Children’s Ministry wing with Sticky Faith values in mind. Then this fall our student ministry willingly volunteered to give away their student ministry room so they could meet in our church’s main auditorium in order to feel more connected to the larger church. We do interdepartmental trainings with volunteers, and have shared a cohesive (and non-competitive) interdepartmental calendar. Our staff structure changed to more effectively work together and better resource people at Frontline.

3.We disciple the entire family, rather than just individual people

Previous to the cohort, our staff worked hard to disciple their own demographic individually. Today, we try our best to ask how the entire family can be discipled. This means our staff regularly has to put our heads together, and work as a team. We still have age-appropriate departments and ministries, but we’re working hard to disciple the family as a whole. We’ve done Sunday morning sermon series based on what we’ve learned from the cohort. We’ve created “Milestones” for families to celebrate and grow together. We’ve provided simple opportunities for families to have spiritual conversations together, and implemented family-based serving opportunities locally and abroad. Before the cohort, we internally believed that in-home discipleship was the most important thing we could provide for a child’s spiritual development, but we didn’t know how to do it. After the cohort, we actually put resources in place to make family discipleship a reality.

4.We measure effectiveness...more effectively

Before the cohort, we essentially measured the effectiveness of a program based on how many people showed up. While we still measure programmatic attendance, the cohort helped us process better ways to measure the effectiveness of what we do. Now, we evaluate our staff differently, recruit and retain volunteers more effectively, and resource and equip parents more passionately. In short, the way we measure success has created a different set of expectations for everybody at Frontline, and we’re much better off because of it.

5. The cohort brought us to sunny California!

I’d be lying if I said that getting to California in February and October wasn’t a draw for us. February’s weather in West Michigan isn’t terribly attractive, and since lake-effect snow doesn’t exist in Los Angeles, it was a fairly easy sell to get our staff to go. In all seriousness, the times on-site in California were critical for us. Meeting the other churches, interacting with the FYI staff, and getting away as a team were all crucial to the cohort being a “win” for Frontline.

I can’t think of anything else Frontline has done over the past 3 years that has changed our culture as much as the Sticky Faith Cohort, and my hope is that as many churches as possible gain the same experience!

Learn More

For questions and to confirm your spot, email Brian Nelson at bnelson@fuller.edu or call (626) 584-5546

3 Parenting Questions for Jim Burns

Shares Oct 28, 2014 Kara Powell

This post is part of a series celebrating the release of the new Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family. We’re interviewing parents who serve, think, and write about faith, family, and ministry.

This week we hear from my dear friend Dr. Jim Burns. Jim and his wife Cathy have three adult daughters (the subject of the first question below!), and Jim is one of the most sought-out voices on family relationships and faith. He serves as President of HomeWord. Jim has written extensively on parenting and marriage, and one of his recent books is Faith Conversations for Families, a great tie-in to Sticky Faith!

I’ve seen how close you are with your daughters, even now that they are young adults. What did you and Cathy do when your girls were younger that helped plant those close relational roots that continue to bear fruit?

You’re right, we are close. And we actually like each other most—but not all—of the time!

Since children regard your very presence as a major sign of caring and connectedness, we decided to practice "the power of being there." I'm not sure we ever missed a game or competition while they grew up. We tried to live by making the kids the first priority on our calendar, along with a weekly date as a couple.

I remember researching traits of healthy families for a book I wrote called 10 Building Blocks to a Solid Family. One of the major traits of a close-knit family was that they played together. So we took it upon ourselves to be very proactive about playing together. Cathy was also fanatical about having dinners together and making sure we went on really fun vacations. Today there are still regular family dinners, and we try to do a family vacation with our adult kids each year. So far, so good. 

What verse of scripture has most shaped your parenting?

I'm not sure we had one favorite verse for the entire time we were raising our kids, but three scriptures come to mind: "Train children in the right way, and when old, they will not stray." (Prov. 22:6) We claimed this verse as a promise, especially in the tougher times. As our girls reached the teenage years, they all took a turn away from what we had hoped and expected. Our goal was that by the time they became young adults, we would have taught them how to find their “Mission, Mate, and Master.” This doesn't mean that they would have it all together, but that we at least helped them learn a biblical view in all three of those areas. Today we are reaping those rewards, but it sure wasn't easy during the tougher times.  

The second scripture is "Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be written upon your hearts. Impress them on your children." (Deut. 6:4,5) This scripture is called the shema, a Hebrew word meaning “to listen,” and it actually is the plan and purpose for the Hebrew people. It's the most often-quoted scripture in the entire Bible because it has been recited every morning and evening in every Orthodox Jewish home since the time of Moses. I can imagine Mary holding the baby Jesus in her arms reciting these words to him. What this scripture taught Cathy and me is that we are called to live our faith out to the best we can, and then in a healthy way “impress” or pass it on to our children. We came up with a Sunday night fun night that included games, fun food, and a short spiritual formation time. Our kids didn't mind, as long as it was a positive environment with fun food!

We also kept a nightly quick prayer time at each of the girls’ bedside. I got in the habit of placing the sign of the cross on their foreheads. One time when one of my adult daughters was going through a tough time, I asked her if I could pray for her. When I was finished praying she took my hand and had me put the sign of the cross on her forehead. I had no idea all those years that this experience meant anything to her. 

The third verse is, "Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life." (Prov. 4:23) Neither Cathy nor I were raised in Christian homes. No one ever taught us how to "guard our hearts." We believed it was very important that we taught our kids (through both words and action) how to have healthy relationships by guarding their hearts as well as learning to guard their hearts in their faith.

In your opinion, what mistakes do fathers tend to make in the way they parent their daughters? 

I meet too many fathers who seem to know what to do with their sons, but who struggle with their daughters. I grew up in a home with all brothers, so when Cathy and I had all girls there were times I did feel like an alien. What am I saying? There are still those times! 

I always suggest to fathers to have a regular date with their daughters. Spending time is a big deal. When they are little, play with them, nurture them, read to them, pray with them. As they get older, they may think you aren't as cool (at least mine did), but continue spending time. I have a yellowed post-it note on my desk that has three letters on it: A.W.E. It stands for affection, warmth, and encouragement. I want to give my girls (and Cathy) plenty of appropriate affection. I want to set a tone in the home of warmth so that when I do have to discipline or call them on something, they remember the warm times too. And I think a dad needs to give his daughters plenty of encouragement. I have a little sign in my office at work that reads, "Every kid needs at least one adult who is irrationally positive about them." I want to be that kind of a dad. 

For more ideas from real families like yours, get the new Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family.

Download the first chapter free

3 Parenting Questions for Danny Kwon

Shares Oct 23, 2014 Kara Powell

This post is part of a series celebrating the release of the new Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family. We’re interviewing parents who serve, think, and write about faith, family, and ministry.

This week we hear from parent and pastor Danny Kwon. Danny has been serving for over 20 years in youth and family ministry at Yuong Sang Church outside Philadelphia. Along with his love for sports, eating, and making people laugh, he is married to Monica, and together they parent three teenagers.

Danny, you’re someone who has served within Korean-American culture for years. What trends do you see in the ways Korean-American families are living out their faith these days?


I would say that the Korean-American church is evolving. My parents were immigrants who spoke very little English. Church was not only a place of worship and faith, but also a social institution where they got to fellowship and network with others like them. Then these parents came to church and sent their teenagers to youth group because it was a social institution as well as a place of faith. Students came because their parents came, and it was a place to have interaction with others like them.

While there are still immigrants from Korea in the Korean-American church, due to the effects of globalism and greater English skills, parents are often more acculturated to America. Korean-American parents now have choices outside of church to socialize. Church is not the center of their life. Whereas in the past many parents would make church a higher priority, now I see that priority lessening for both parents and students.

How has your own recent doctoral research on innovation impacted your parenting?


I am a youth pastor and parent of three teenagers. When I studied innovation and innovative churches and how they are practicing youth ministry, it was very interesting to see that many parents do value their youth ministry. Many like it. I know that implementing Sticky Faith, and in particular moving to a more intergenerational ministry paradigm, can be hard. But one thing I have realized from my research is that parents seem to like youth ministry the way it is.

As far as how that has impacted my parenting, I would say that as a parent/youth pastor, it has made me be more empathetic to parents as we nurture change in our youth ministry. I need to understand that change is hard. I need to find ways to implement innovation in ways that are sensitive to parents.

I find myself saying as a parent that it is a lot harder getting my own teenage kids to come with me to an intergenerational worship service rather than just send them to the youth group. Moreover, just sitting with them during worship and discussing the sermon afterward—that takes a lot of effort! It is not easy implementing an innovation like Sticky Faith, and in particular for parents like me, it takes time to get used to change.

Living on the Northeast coast, what are some of the regional challenges and opportunities you see when it comes to building faith in families?


My son just entered 12th grade. When we visited colleges this past summer across the Northeast, I noticed the kind of schools he liked and disliked. The schools he liked were the ones that seemed more laid-back and seemingly less "cutthroat." Living in the Northeast, there are stereotypes that people are more driven, Type A, and competitive. Many of the stereotypes ring true.

I think about families who are super busy and stressed out. The pressure to succeed in sports or academics is intense. Conversely, those who don't seem to “make the cut” struggle with feelings of failure.

Of course this is not only a Northeast thing. But perhaps the biggest implication in all this is where faith and family come together. Families and youth group students miss church all the time for travel sports teams, required community service, or just because they are overwhelmed with homework. And for parents, engaging faith through the church is just one of the many "activities" for their kids to choose from.

One opportunity that has arisen out of all this is that as our church has a very active summer short-term missions program, we have made it clear to parents and students that they can serve God and get community service hours for school. Most of the time they can get approval to complete required hours through our trips. Ultimately, this has been a great way to help students serve others, to spend time with them as they grow in faith, and to reduce some of their stress about staying on top of the pressures of high school as they serve others.

For more ideas from real families like yours, get the new Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family.

Download the first chapter free

5 Ways Catholic Leaders Win at Social Media

Shares Oct 21, 2014 Art Bamford

Recently Fast Company featured an article titled “Blogging Nuns, Tweeting Monks, And The Catholic Church’s Digital Revolution” that examines a “movement sweeping the Catholic world: monks, nuns, everyday people of faith, and, most famously, the Pope (@Pontifex) himself, are embracing digital media.”

This is just one of a number of articles we have seen on this topic since Pope Francis’ installation in 2013. People are increasingly taking notice of how Roman Catholic leaders have responded to, and are using, social media and digital technology, particularly in how they engage young people.

What is it about recent Catholic social media strategies that have been so effective in reaching out? We thought it might be helpful to identify a few key things that Protestant Christians might learn from our Catholic brothers and sisters. Here are some pointers from watching @Pontifex and associates:[1]  

1. Have Fun

Catholic leaders have responded to new media and technology with a kind of playful irreverence that has been fun to follow, and attractive to folks outside the church.[2] While it is important that church leaders take technology seriously, and think critically about the role it plays in our lives, it is also important that we do not take it too seriously. Catholic leaders have done a great job defying expectations that they would ignore or dismiss digital technology simply by playing around with it, the way we all do after buying a new device.

2. Have Hope

In recent press coverage on media, Catholic leaders begin responding to journalists’ questions by affirming new devices and apps as potential channels through which the gospel may reach a new audience.[3] These leaders often add an appropriate warning about potential negative effects, but their first response is hopeful optimism about sharing the gospel in new ways.

3. Have Patience

Apart from some general guidelines on how to use digital media, like these (which are worth checking out) from the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops, the Vatican has been slow to initiate formal, substantial changes to their theology, liturgy, or church buildings. Practically every Christian leader has felt an increasing sense of urgency about the Church’s need to respond and adapt to digital media in recent years. For the most part, the Roman Catholic Church has done an admirable job of continuing to set its own agenda. Catholic leaders have prioritized their concerns based on the mission of the Church rather than the demands of popular culture.[4]   

4. Have Humility

Despite all the trolling and negativity that happens online, Catholic leaders jumped in on social media without much concern for how they might be perceived or received. That eagerness to connect has resonated with young people, and provided a healthy, much-needed boost to the Church’s reputation.[5] Some Protestant organizations have approached social media in a top-down way, like a publisher or television network, aiming to produce content the same way as before and send it out through a different channel. That model for producing digital content often registers as marketing and is seen as inauthentic by many young people. Catholic leaders have made strong connections online as people rather than as organizations or celebrity platforms.[6]

5. Have Hobbies

A lot of press coverage we’ve seen profiles quirky clergy sharing their passions and hobbies outside of the church online. Unlike many of our older types of media, which are good for getting messages out from one source to a big audience, social media is more well-suited for connecting one to one. Being a part of online communities centered around a hobby can be a great way to meet people, develop friendships, and (eventually) discuss your faith. A lot of folks wrongly assume that religion is a kind of hobby, or that Christians don’t have other interests outside of church. Catholic leaders have done a great job dispelling that myth by building new friendships through shared interests online. They have allowed strangers a glimpse into how their vocations, hobbies, and beliefs fit together as a holistic, meaning-filled and joyful life.

 

[1] See QJ Schultze, Christianity and the mass media in America: Toward a democratic accommodation (MSU Press, 2012) for an overview of how the two traditions have differed with regards to media and technology; also SM Hoover & SS Kim, Digital Media and the Protestant Establishment: Insights from “The New Media Project” in Finding Religion in the Media (2012), is an excellent overview of more recent trends in Protestant approaches to digital media.

3 Parenting Questions for Kristen Ivy

Shares Oct 17, 2014 Kara Powell

This post is part of a series celebrating the release of the new Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family. We’re interviewing parents who think and write about faith, family, and ministry.

This week we hear from author, mom, and ministry leader Kristen Ivy. Kristen serves as the Executive Director of Messaging at Orange, blogs at theparentcue.org, and and is the co-author of Playing for Keeps. With her husband Matt, she parents two preschoolers in the Atlanta area.
 

Kristen, how do you make sure you’re the parent you want to be in the midst of your demanding job?


I am never the parent I want to be.

But then again, I fall short of my own standard pretty regularly, so maybe it’s no surprise that the same is true of my parenting. Being a working mother isn’t easy. The only way to approach it is to walk with enough humility to admit my faults, to accept forgiveness not only from God, but also from my husband and children, and to be willing to forgive myself.

For the record, every day I don’t . . .

… shower, dress well, and show up to work on-time, put together,

and remember to send back the library books.

… lead staff, lead meetings, generate new ideas, innovate systems,

and remember to sign the kids up for the next round of swim lessons.

… play with my kids as much as they would like,

read to my kids as much as their teachers would like,

finish all the laundry, clean the kitchen, write a few blogs,

or get as much sleep as I would like.

A few months ago, I wrote a blog post for Orange Parents that answered some of how I try to prioritize in the midst of sometimes un-doable expectations:

People over tasks. Whether it’s my kids or my co-workers, the people in my world matter more than the tasks at hand. When the day is over, if the people I’m closest to feel supported and loved, the day is a success—even if there’s still a pile of laundry at the foot of the bed and I didn’t answer every email.

Reality over Perception. The Room Mom might judge me for bringing store-bought cupcakes to the party instead of homemade ones. My co-workers may be frustrated when I change the time of a meeting because I forgot that I was the “mystery-reader” that day, or I have to run to the pediatrician again. Every day, I have a choice: I can worry about the perceptions others have about my “failures” as a mom or as an executive, or I can focus on what I need to do in the moment. Most of the time it’s just a whole lot better to figure out how to work within my capacity, than to spend time worried about perceptions.

Authenticity over Perfection. I don’t plan to raise perfect kids; but I do want to raise kids who know how to work hard and deal with failure well. I don’t plan to lead teams who respect me because I’m the perfect leader; but I do hope we can respect each other for our gifts and abilities in spite of our weaknesses and struggles. For those reasons, I choose to work and parent with authenticity even when it means I have to own up to not meeting my own or someone else’s expectations.

As part of the Orange team, I know you’re committed to families and churches partnering together in the spiritual formation of kids.  As a parent, how have you tried to support your own church’s children’s ministry?


I think two things are true about how Orange has influenced my personal relationship with the local church where I serve.

1. As a parent, I am more aware of my own role in the spiritual development of my children. I also see that my role is connected to what leaders at our church are doing on Sunday mornings. We try to reinforce at home what we know they are doing at church in things like:

  • We have window markers that we use to write the monthly memory verse on our sliding glass door.
  • We talk about the story they learned on Sunday when it makes sense.
  • In our car, we sometimes play a CD of music they sing at church.
  • We pray together at bedtime.
  • When we talk about faith and character issues, we use the same language the church uses so there is consistency.

2. As a volunteer for student ministry at my church, I’m more aware of my responsibility to partner with the parents of my small group. Right now I’m currently working with Elle Campbell to write a short E-Book with some practical ways we have tried to partner with parents as small group leaders in student ministry. A few of those are:

  • Emailing the parent any time a new student is added to my group to introduce myself and to ask the parent to share a few things with me about their kid.
  • Communicating to parents about what’s happening at the church, in the ministry, and in our small group so they have the information they need.
  • Making an effort to personally meet the parents when we have special events or whenever I go to their games/ plays /etc…
  • Sharing positive stories about parents with my group.
  • Sharing positive things about my students with their parents.
  • Giving parents credit for the positive characteristics that I see in their children.

What has parenting taught you about yourself that you wouldn’t have learned otherwise?


I can type with one hand.

I can make a pretty good “Elsa” out of Wikki sticks.

I still remember a lot of songs that my mother used to sing to me.

I am not at all good at sitting back and watching someone mess up (I really, really want to intervene).

I don’t serve others well when I haven’t taken care of myself well.

I really, really, really need other people to help me.

For the rest of my life I will love two people with a kind of love I never imagined possible.

For more ideas from real families like yours, get the new Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family.

Download the first chapter for free

 

Come create a Sticky Faith Culture with us. Join our next Cohort

Shares Oct 15, 2014 Brad M. Griffin

Photo by Kai.

What is a Sticky Faith Cohort?

When someone asks me that question, I can’t help but feel like responding, “How much time do you have to talk?” This past week the FYI team welcomed our Sticky Faith Cohort church teams here in Pasadena, and if we could have piped you into that gathering, you’d get a real sense for the energy and ideas that bounce around like sparks in a roaring campfire.

The Sticky Faith Cohort offers advanced leadership training and research-driven collaboration within a community of leaders committed to help young people develop the lifelong faith they need. How do we do that? Through offering you:

  • One year of personalized coaching for your ministry team
  • A breakthrough plan that will refocus your team’s needs and move toward Sticky Faith
  • Monthly research-based webinars with FYI and other leading ministry voices
  • Two three-day gatherings in Pasadena, CA, focused on executing change relevant to your church
     

 

The bottom line is that the Cohort is more than a conference. It’s a catalyst for culture change within your community. For many leaders who have been through one of our prior Cohorts, they share that it’s nothing less than transformational.

“We now look at things through different lenses, making decisions in light of longevity. We don’t say, ‘Will this event be successful tonight?’ but rather, ‘Will it successfully cultivate faith that will last?’ The Cohort has changed how we program, how we spend our budget, and what we prioritize.”

– John Rosensteel, Blackhawk Church, Madison Wisconsin

We know that is also true for our team as we journey with congregations just like yours each year. More than a hundred churches from across the U.S. and Canada have already taken this next leap toward Sticky Faith. Are you ready to join us?
 


 

Join Kara Powell and me on a conference call October 16, 9:00am PT to discuss any questions regarding the yearlong Cohort process. Call in at:  (619) 326-2730 Access Code: 559575. Email Brian Nelson at bnelson@fuller.edu with additional questions.

The deadline is December 15th for the 2015 cohort; don’t miss getting a spot for next year!

 

Real training for real urban leaders

Shares Oct 14, 2014 Irene Cho

As a youth ministry leader in an urban setting, Tameka needed training relevant to her neighborhood. She needed professors who are putting their heads to work alongside their hands in the trenches with young people in the city. And she wanted to get more practical and applicable training for ministry without having to move out of her neighborhood. Tamika found the perfect fit with FYI's Urban Youth Ministry Certificate program. Watch her story to find out what happened next:
 

 


Tameka is one of nearly two hundred leaders from around the country who have grown through studying ​at​ Fuller in Urban Youth Ministry. We​ a​re now accepting applicants for our ​10th cohort, beginning in 2015. Through distance learning and two in-person intensive weeks over the course of two years, you can be part of the only accredited graduate-level Urban Youth certificate program in the country.

Join a Free Webcast with Compassion and Kara Powell on Bringing Families Back to Church

Shares Oct 10, 2014 Fuller Youth Institute

Looking to spread the Sticky Faith movement to families in your community? Join the Fuller Youth Institute and Compassion International as we host a dialogue around how we can bring families back to church.

Save the date!


November 11th 11:00-12:30 PT as Dr. Kara Powell (Fuller Youth Institute), David Kinnaman (The Barna Group), Ryan Frank (KidzMatter, Awana), Sherry Surratt (MOPS International), and Mark Yeadon (Compassion International) will share practical, tested ways you can reach and invest in families in your community.

The first 300 guests to register and attend will receive a free copy of The Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family. Pre-register for the event today and receive a free chapter of the book.

 

Three Parenting Questions for Chap Clark

Shares Oct 07, 2014 Kara Powell

Photo by Takuya.

I don’t know about you, but as a parent I’m always wondering how other parents manage life, work, marriage, parenting, and faith. And not just manage, but find ways to thrive.

As we celebrate the release of the new Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family, we’re starting a new blog series interviewing other parents who think and write about faith, family, and ministry. This post kicks off the series with our very dear Fuller colleague Chap Clark, coauthor of Sticky Faith: Everyday Ideas to Build Lasting Faith in Your Kids. Chap and his wife Dee raised three children to adulthood together, and we caught up with him to ask a few questions that were burning on our minds.

Chap, given all of your research and experience through the years with teenagers, what do you wish you had known about parenting when your own kids were younger?


That list is long! But when I think back to some of the core experiences through the growing years, one of the biggest is how difficult for me (Dee was always better at this) was my short-term thinking at times. There were "skirmishes" along the way, like what to wear to Sunday school, or what music to listen to, that sometimes ended up as major power struggles. As I look back and as I have conversations with our adult children, no matter who "won," these almost always ended up being negative (or at best neutral) experiences for our kids. My oldest, for example, recently shared with me how he wished that instead of outright banning certain bands or songs, we would have taken his interest in them more seriously, listened and researched some together, and figured out a way to train him about discernment while still honoring whatever drew him to that music. Picking battles is so vital as a parent. We have to realize how few "sprints" there really are when it comes to raising our kids, and that the journey is more like a marathon!

You've written books about dads and daughters as well as dads and sons. What's one word of advice you would give to fathers about their relationship with their daughters, and one word of advice you'd give about their relationship with their sons?


Dads, you have the strongest voice your daughter will ever know in how you help her to see her worth and value as a person, a unique and magnificent creation from God's hand. So much of what she will experience growing up in our society will teach her that her worth and value is found in how she can attract and please a man. You have to be the one to help her discover the inherent dignity of her person, as a person. 

To your son, you are the single most significant model of being a man that he will ever know. Although almost all of the books and messages out there define maleness as innately aggressive, assertive, "hunter," and "warrior," the New Testament provides the characteristics of a man as one who is created in the image of God. That image "became flesh and lived among us" as Jesus. Both in the life of Christ and in the epistles, the marks of a disciple are clear in how God has created us to live our lives as men, with: 

  • "compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience" (Col. 3:12).
  • "love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control" (Gal 5:22-23).
  • "gentleness and respect" (1 Peter 3:15).

Dads, the life we are to live that defines who we are as those set free to live and serve in God's kingdom are what it means to be a man. Your son, and your daughter, needs to know that these are the characteristics that set you apart from a man who does not know God. 

As a part of this modeling, fathers have the unique responsibility to teach their sons how to treat not only their sisters, but also all females. Jokes, glances, crude or even slightly derogatory comments about or to women are the worst model our sons could receive as they are trying to buck the trend of the objectification of women.  

How has being married to a therapist made you a different father to your kids?


I happen to be married to an incredibly healthy, and in the best sense of the word, powerful person who was an extremely gifted intuitive counselor long before she became a successful therapist. I married a person who has been as rich and gifted a partner as I could ever dream of knowing. She has been gracious, patient, and kind as I have attempted to learn and to grow.

Dee has been careful to be honest, but in a way that has opened conversation rather than discourage me. She has been an invaluable coach as I have sought to "work out my salvation" by gently bringing up where I have had blind spots, all while being open to my input in her life. In parenting, she taught me to concentrate on responding rather than reacting to a situation, to know when to ask questions before jumping to conclusions, judgment, or advice, and how to be both a caring friend to my kids while also being their responsible parent (although I still have a ways to go on each of these). Lastly, her insights and giftedness have so wonderfully complemented mine. Together we have helped each other in our callings in ways I never could have imagined.

For more ideas from real families like yours, get the new Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family.

Download the first chapter for FREE

How can I connect with FYI at Youth Specialties’ NYWC in Sacramento this week?

Shares Oct 02, 2014 Fuller Youth Institute

Great question! The FYI team will be around Youth Specialties’ National Youth Workers Convention in Sacramento and would love to see you. Here are a few ways to connect with us:

Meet-Ups

  • The FYI and Fuller Booth: Several Fuller Seminary and FYI team members will be at the booth throughout the weekend during exhibit hall hours, especially Matthew and Brian. Stop by for information about Fuller academic programs, Sticky Faith Cohorts, our books and resources, or whatever you're curious about. Sign up for our free resources and get entered into hourly drawings for free copies of Can I Ask That? Plus, we would love for you to add some ideas to our customized Sticky Faith wall throughout the weekend!
  • Exhibit Hall Stage: Come hear Kara and Brad interview each other at our Exhibit Hall Stage time 3:45-3:55pm on Friday. You might learn something surprising.
  • Sticky Faith Author Meet-Up: Kara and Brad will be at the FYI booth Friday from 4:00-4:30pm and want to chat with you. Please drop by to say hey.
  • Thinking about joining our Sticky Faith Cohort? If you're considering joining our yearlong Sticky Faith Cohort in 2015, drop by to talk with Brian at the booth, or shoot him an email and set up a time to talk over coffee.

Seminars, Intensives, and Panels

  • Sticky Faith Intensive: Kara and Brad will be teaching this learning lab on Thursday 1-6pm in Room CC 302/303. It's a great way to take a 4-hour dive into Sticky Faith (additional registration fee required.)
  • Kara in the Saturday Morning Big Room: Last-Minute Change! Kara was slated to speak Saturday evening in Big Room, but that just changed to Saturday morning in the 9:15-10:45am Big Room 4. DON’T MISS IT.
  • Sticky Faith Family Ministry Seminar: Kara will be leading a Sticky Faith seminar focusing on the new content shared in the Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family on Saturday from 4-5:30pm in Room CC 313.
  • Late Night Film Premier! Kara and Matthew from our team will be sharing a premier sneak peek of our new video series that will help you partner with parents in nurturing faith in families. Join us from 10:00-11:00pm Saturday night in Room CC 306.
  • Seminar with Steve Argue: On Sunday from 9:15-10:45am Steve will be presenting “Helping parents parent their post-high school kids” Room CC 306. Come learn from Mars Hill Grand Rapids’ pastor and resident theologian and FYI partner!

Pick up a copy of the All-New Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family

This is exciting: In addition to our other Sticky Faith resources, the YS Store will be selling the all-new Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family, and Zondervan is running an ebook discount of $2.99 all weekend. We’ll also be giving them away in surprise locations around the convention. Follow us on social media @stickyfaith and @fullerfyi to discover where.

Whether you catch us in a seminar, stop us in the hall, or join one of the Big Room sessions Irene will help facilitate, we hope to see you around NYWC this weekend!