Youth ministry burnout doesn’t have to be your story

It was the perfect youth ministry calendar.

We had built so much momentum and were tapping into that energy to fuel a year of go-go-go. A spring break trip. Not one but two summer mission trips, plus camp, a backpacking adventure, and a high-octane “Youth Week” leading up to the start of school. Did I mention helping kids’ ministry run a week of VBS?

Then we launched into our fall kickoff, followed by separate weekend retreats for middle and high school students. Soon it was time for our big Thanksgiving weekend fundraiser heading into the packed holiday season. Somehow we also managed to keep up the grind of twice-weekly programming and show up for students’ games, concerts, and family events.

I was younger then. But still, I can’t help but look back and wonder: Why didn’t anyone say this was just too much? How did our volunteer team stay so engaged? How did I ever survive in youth ministry with this kind of pace?

In truth, it’s quite possible someone did raise concerns and I shrugged them off. The conversations have faded. It’s also true that I didn’t keep up the pace.

Who could?

During the Fuller Youth Institute team’s recent research into youth leader burnout and wellbeing, I couldn’t help but think back to that frenetic ministry year. What seemed like the perfect calendar was actually a perfect recipe for exhaustion and burnout. And while a lot has changed in youth ministry since then, I was reminded of my former self when I read this youth leader’s reflection: 

“I overshoot the moon during the summer. We have middle school service trip, high school service trip, beach retreat. And then in between we have all these serving options, and lake day, and registration for life groups. And I remember about this time last year meeting with my supervisor and just crying, and I was really embarrassed. And he sort of gently reminded me, ‘You make the schedule. You don't have to overfill the schedule.’”

I couldn’t help but nod along. I also have a lot of compassion for leaders like this—and maybe like you—who feel compelled to keep pushing, keep filling the schedule, keep raising the game because, in your church’s eyes, a full calendar is a perfect calendar.

Until it’s not.

In our research, we found that 70% of youth leaders agree or strongly agree that they hope to be serving in their current faith community in five years. 57% consider youth ministry their long-term calling.

How do we help these hopes become reality? How do we keep going in youth ministry without burning out?

You can download The FYI Report on Youth Leader Burnout & Wellbeing for free to learn more. Alongside the report, here are a few research-based tips for breaking through burnout to build sustainability for the long haul.

Be careful with your “yes”

Several youth leaders we interviewed found themselves saying “yes” to too many asks and opportunities, which ultimately contributed to burnout. Whether the “yes” came from a desire to please or because the opportunities felt exciting at the time, many regretted not considering the whole picture of what they were already committed to (both inside and outside of the church) before agreeing to new responsibilities.

Sometimes extra work is imposed on leaders like you. One interviewee shared,

“My job description completely changed within my first six months. I was the student and college pastor. Now I'm also our media specialist. So I do all of our graphic design, I do all of our social media, I do all of our church photography, I do videography stuff. All of that got tacked on . . . I was very frustrated because within less than a year of my time here, my job changed completely.”

If you’re feeling similarly, take the opportunity to evaluate your workload. Track your hours to know exactly how much time you spend doing what. You may need to educate your supervisor or others about what you actually do in the course of a week, especially if your responsibilities have increased little by little over time. Consider whether there are ways to shift work or create boundaries to ensure your time is going to what’s most important.

Watch your exhaustion level

Everyone gets tired doing ministry—or any kind of work. But pay attention to when you find yourself exhausted and completely drained. This could be a warning sign of burnout.

In our research, participants responded to several exhaustion-related questions on a frequency scale from 1-5 where 1=never and 5=always. Across the entire sample, “How often do you feel tired?” received an average response of 4, “often.”

When we looked more closely at the data, we noticed that those who registered high levels of burnout all year scored significantly above average in four key areas: frequency of feeling tired, feeling worn out, emotional exhaustion, and the emotional toll of work.

Periodically check in with yourself to do a quick inventory of these questions:

• How often do I feel tired?
• How often do I feel worn out?
• How often am I emotionally exhausted?
• Is my work emotionally exhausting?

If you’re answering “often” or “always” to one or more of these questions, it may be time to take a break, prioritize getting more rest, or have a conversation with a trusted friend or mentor about how to reverse this trend.

Plan your breaks

We all need breaks. Every day, every week, every season, and every year, we need rhythms of rest and renewal in order to keep going in our work and all areas of our lives. This can be tricky in ministry when your job requires frequent evening and weekend responsibilities, and you may not be paid full-time or provided with paid time off for vacation.

We heard from leaders who shared that they feel pressure to keep working even when they’re investing up to 60 hours a week in youth ministry. We also heard from leaders like this who had normalized burnout:

“I've been on church staff for about 12 years now. I think youth ministry, it takes pieces of you. Even when you have the healthiest of boundaries and Sabbath and all of those things, even supportive church leadership, it just takes pieces of you. I have never taken a summer vacation. You know, those kinds of things that you just start to lose.”

If that sounds familiar, it might be time to pay more attention to your breaks. Think of your day in thirds or quarters, and identify one segment of each day when you will not do anything ministry-related. In addition, prioritize sleep. Sleep is our great nightly replenisher, and most of us don’t get enough of it. Without adequate sleep, you will not only struggle with energy—you will also find it harder to regulate your emotions and put your long-term physical health at risk.

Ideally, you also need one day of each week to rest and recharge from ministry work. Hint: it’s not Sunday. Depending on your context, Saturday may also not be an option. Find a day you can create ministry boundaries and talk with your supervisor and team about the support you need to keep those boundaries.

Look at the annual calendar and target the times of year when you feel most susceptible to burnout, then plan ahead to counteract exhaustion. If possible, schedule some sort of short break during each window. If not, plan a longer vacation for afterward. Having something on your calendar to look forward to later can help you keep going in an intense season.

Prioritize relationships outside your ministry

Our research suggests that loneliness and isolation might drive some youth leaders out of ministry more than the work itself. So be careful if you’re starting to feel isolated.

Being seen and known in your church is important, and having friendships is critical for feeling like you belong. But you also need places and relationships where you can just be a person, not a pastor.

So work on making and keeping friends outside of church. Find people who share hobbies or interests. Invest in your family and closest relationships—those who will still be on your team even if you leave your current ministry setting.

Many leaders also find youth ministry mentors and networks, whether in person or online, helpful sources of support. Sometimes it’s relieving to be with people who get your work without much explanation (or defense) of your job. These relationships might also help you evaluate when to lean in and when it may be time to consider moving on.

Advocate for yourself

We want you to be healthier in ministry. We think it’s possible to build healthy, sustainable rhythms for the ministry long haul. And in some cases, that may mean leaving an unhealthy situation. But often, a little self-advocacy can go a long way.

Start by sharing our research report (or even just the executive summary) with your supervisor. Talk about what resonates with you and what surprises you. Use it to initiate meaningful conversations with your boss and ask for their insights and what’s worked for them to stay in ministry over time.

If you’ve already identified some real needs, don’t be afraid to ask for comp days, more vacation time, better benefits, or a raise to better support your household financial realities. These conversations may not always go well, but more often than not, your supervisor will want to work with you to figure out what can contribute to more sustainable ministry.

That’s better for you, better for young people, and better for the whole church.

The FYI Report on Youth Leader Burnout & Wellbeing offers fresh perspective on common contributors to burnout among youth leaders, partnered with practical recommendations to prevent burnout and promote their wellbeing. Download the FREE report today, and together let’s turn the tide on youth leader burnout.

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