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Month 1: Your Community

Month 2: Your Life

Month 3: Your Pain

Month 4: Your Struggles

Month 5: Your Rhythms

Month 2: Your Life

Article:

Your Life: Finding Space to Love God, Your Neighbor, and Yourself in the City by Jude Tiersma Watson and Kimberly Williams How does our own spiritual, emotional, physical, and mental health impact the ways we love God and others? In Month 2 of the Sabbath Rest in a 24/7 City series, we look at our own lives for clues to preventing stress and burnout.

Podcast:

Wiley Scott Interview
Kara Powell interviews Wiley Scott, the Young Life Northern Division Vice President for Field Ministries, on finding rhythms of balance, rest, and healthy relationships in urban youth ministry.

Audio podcast:

Leroy Barber Interview
Kara Powell interviews Leroy Barber, president of Mission Year, about finding personal, relational, and spiritual health in the midst of ministry.

Practices:

Each month features weekly practices that you can incorporate into your daily rhythms. We have intentionally made these practices simple and focused, hoping you will take time with each one during the course of the month. Note that these exercises can be done alone, but work well with a partner or group. You can download the below practices in one printable document (pdf format) to keep in your Bible, post on your refrigerator, or whatever is most helpful to you.
 

Week 01

In their landmark book Boundaries: When to Say Yes, When to Say No to Take Control of Your Life, Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend recognize that "we need to set mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual boundaries for our lives to help us distinguish what is our responsibility and what isn't." ((Henry Cloud & John Townsend, Boundaries: When to Say Yes, When to Say No to Take Control of Your Life (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1992), 25.)) So as urban youth workers, how do we love our God, our neighbors, and ourselves in the ways we take care of ourselves physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually?  In order to understand how this looks for urban youth workers, we asked youth workers April Diaz and Carla LaFayette to share some of their own rhythms. April Diaz has been doing youth ministry for a dozen years, and currently is the Next Generation pastor (birth-high school) at Newsong Church in Irvine, California.  Here are some of her tips for finding balance and health in ministry:

Physical: I am loving myself best when I have a regular rhythm of working out (yoga, strength training, cardio).  When I'm not in that flow, I know that my boundaries are weak.  Turning off my cell phone and not checking email during evenings, my Sabbath, and day of rest also helps me disengage from ministry and love myself and my family better.

Mental: Turning off my ministry brain is the greatest asset to recovery for me.  Intentionally choosing to cease thinking about ministry problems when I leave an event or the office helps me care for myself in ways I never have before.

Spiritual: I think everyone has to find a pattern of silence and solitude.  For me, I've found that I need a few hours every Monday morning and one day a month away to stay deeply connected to God. Brennan Manning's challenge to be very wary of the person who cannot be alone with God has really changed me.

Carla LaFayette has been in youth-related ministry full time for just under 25 years. Currently she serves as the Vice President of Strategic Programs at the Urban Youth Workers Institute (uywi.org).  Here are her reflections on personal health in ministry:

Physical: I've always found it helpful to tell others what my physical struggles and goals are so that it's "out there" for them to see.  Otherwise, I can cheat and cut corners all I want in public secrecy.  In my latest attempt to stay healthy I joined an eating program with a close friend who allows me to stay accountable while traveling by bugging her with texts and phone calls. It does my ministry no good if I keep the scales tipped toward busyness while my body takes the toll of neglect.

Emotional: Because of a heavy travel schedule, I find that my "emotional tank" gets drained pretty quickly while on the road. One very practical thing I do weekly is call my dad on Sunday afternoons - no matter what city or time zone I happen to be in.  This keeps me grounded to the family community I so desperately need and allows for continuing bonding time with my dad.

Spiritual: The single most helpful element in my spiritual journey is mentoring relationships. Without these relationships I easily lose focus and find myself wandering far and wide. I recently committed to pray daily about a particular life issue and invited a coworker to join me.  At the end of each work day we meet for 15 minutes to pray together and it has transformed both my prayer life and our relationship. It has been liberating to learn that one of my divine pathways to God is through relationships.

Making it Personal:

1. What aspect of your life (physical, mental, spiritual, emotional) is most in need of some new rhythms?
2. What ideas from April and Carla would you like to try?
3. What other ideas do you have?  When can you try those ideas this week?
    

Week 02

This week check out the Professional Quality of Life (ProQOL) Screening that can be found at: http://www.proqol.org/ProQol_Test.html. This is an assessment that looks at your Compassion Satisfaction, Burnout, and Trauma/Compassion Fatigue. ((According to the ProQOL Manual: Compassion Satisfaction is about the pleasure you derive from being able to do your work well. Burnout is associated with feelings of hopelessness and difficulties in dealing with work or in doing your job effectively. Compassion fatigue/Secondary Trauma is about your work-related, secondary exposure to extremely stressful events (pg 5 of the PorQOL Manual). B. Hudnall Stamm, Ph.D. The Professional Quality of Life Scale: Compassion Satisfaction, Burnout & Compassion Fatigue/Secondary Trauma Scales, Published by the Institute of Rural Health Idaho State University and Sidran Press.  

Week 03

The podcasts for our series this month come from Wiley Scott, a regional vice president for Young Life, and Leroy Barber, author of the book New Neighbor and president of the urban ministry Mission Year. Both share from their experiences of creating sustainable lives as urban youth workers.  

Week 04

In her book, God's Joyful Surprises, Sue Monk Kidd challenges us to "Consider how carefully God has designed space into the world." According to Kidd, "It's the spaces that shape and define creation." ((Sue Monk Kidd, God's Joyful Surprise, San Francisco, CA: Harper and Row, 1987, 161.)) Space defines non-space. Without space between notes, music would just be noise. Without the space from stoplights we would constantly have accidents. For this week carve out between two and six hours of space. During this time turn off your cell phone, shut off your computer, leave your house, and set your work aside. This is a time of embracing your role as the beloved.  

Going Deeper

Emily White Hodge has been working in the urban non-profit world for 15 years in various capacities. She has served as a Youth Pastor, Mentor, Young Life leader, Executive Assistant and Operations Director at various organizations. Her passion is empowering and helping people from various backgrounds to build bridges between cultures. Emily wrote a reflection as a mother on her young daughter's ability to help her slow down and reconsider her pace in life and ministry. Download her reflection (pdf) here.  

Month 4: Your Struggles

Article:

Your Struggles: From Coping to Freedom by Kimberly Williams In our pursuit of rest and balance in ministry, exploring our struggles and addictions is not an option. In this article, we look toward ways to recognize and find healing for our addictive patterns.

Podcast:

Mark Laaser Interview
Kara Powell interviews addiction recovery specialist Mark Laaser about the realities of addiction and ministry.
 

Practices:

Each month of the Sabbath Rest journey will feature weekly practices that you can incorporate into your daily rhythms. We have intentionally made these practices simple and focused. Note that these exercises can be done alone, but work well with a partner or group. You can download the below practices in one printable document (pdf format) to keep in your Bible, post on your refrigerator, or whatever is most helpful to you.
 

Week 01

Read the article, “Your Struggles: From Coping to Freedom.” Then reflect on these questions:

• What specifically resonated with you in this article? Why do you think that is?
• Can you identify any coping mechanisms you find yourself using to cover up your struggles, to cover up facing yourself and God? Do you find yourself getting lost in video games? The internet? Your work or ministry?
• Try this prayer exercise, adapted from Psalm 37:7. Author Don Postema instructs, “Allow this text to lead you gradually into a quiet, relaxed space before God....savoring each line before going on to the next.” ((Don Postema, Catch Your Breath: God's Invitation to Sabbath Rest (Grand Rapids: Faith Alive Christian Resources, 1997), 19.))

Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently… Be still before the Lord and wait… Be still before the Lord… Be still… Be… —Psalm 37:7

Week 02

Do you know what resources are available to you? A recent study asked urban youth workers what emotional/relational, physical, and spiritual resources they used in the past 12 months. ((Cynthia Eriksson et al, Fuller Youth Institute, “Risk and Resilience in Urban Youth Ministry: Stress, Spirituality, and Support,” full report available online at http://www.fulleryouthinstitute.org/pdfs/risk_and_resilience_report_2007.pdf.)) Of these services, Physical Health resources were used the most: General physician=52%, Dentist=36%, and OB/GYN=26%. Spiritual Health Support resources were utilized the next most: Personal Spiritual Mentor/Director=22%, Clergy=18%, and Teammate/Coworker=13%.

Unfortunately, Emotional/Relational Support resources were utilized the least:

Individual counseling/psychotherapy=13%
Clergy=8%
Lay Counselor/Spiritual Director=8%.

Take some time this week to gather information about the resources that are available to you, and consider when you may need to access some of these resources for yourself.

The study also found that the top three barriers to utilizing services were lack of time, affordability, and self-addressing the problem. What are some of the barriers that may keep you from you from utilizing the resources available to you?

Week 03

Take some time to listen to the podcast with Dr. Mark Laaser for this month. Laaser notes that one of the key features of addiction is being disconnected from God, others, and ourselves. So one of the first steps in healing is getting connected. Find one safe person in the next week and begin to share your own story of struggle.

Week 04

This month’s article talks about being committed to addressing our struggles. This can be overwhelming to think about at times. Those in 12-step groups are familiar with the language of “one day at a time.” How is it that we can continue to make choices towards healing? N.T. Wright, a respected New Testament Theologian, gave a recent talk in Pasadena, CA. When discussing the topic of virtue and living out the lives that we were created to live, he describes making a thousand small choices, so that when we have to make the choice that really counts it will be like second nature. What is one small choice you can focus on making this week that will draw you closer to facing yourself and facing God?

If you’re interested in listening to or watching N.T. Wright’s talk, entitled “A Evening with N.T. Wright” you can download it for free from iTunes U. 

Going Deeper

Check yourself. To some degree we all struggle with coping mechanisms and wounds from our past. At what point do we need to talk through these things with a trusted friend, and at what point do we need some professional help? Check out some of the assessments below to get a current pulse on your own levels of need:

For Alcoholism: http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=71
For Sex Addiction: http://www.sexhelp.com/sast.cfm 
For an Eating Disorder: http://psychcentral.com/eatingquiz.htm
For Workaholism http://www.workaholics-anonymous.org/page.php?page=knowing
For Co-Dependency http://www.mental-health-today.com/articles/codepen.htm
For Video Game Addiction: http://www.videogameaddiction.net/video-game-addiction-symptoms.php
For Internet Addiction: http://counsellingresource.com/quizzes/internet-addiction/index.html
For a Pornography Addiction: http://www.no-porn.com/test.html (Check out this resource: http://xxxchurch.com/gethelp/)

Additional Self-Care Resources from the FYI Site

Adrenalin: Our Secret Addiction

Adrenalin addiction, while rarely discussed, is perhaps one of the more pervasive addictions for leaders and 

Rest in the City

While it may seem an oxymoron, resting in the city is not only possible, but imperative for urban youth workers. Read on as Kimberly Williams explores the “prayer of rest” as a method for encountering God in the city, suburbs, or wherever you find yourself in ministry.

Stress in the City: A New Study of Youth Workers

Do you ever wonder about the personal impact of ministry stress? Do you ever suspect that the risks of your ministry might outweigh the ability you have to survive or be resilient in the midst of them? This report looks at the findings from a recent FYI study of urban youth workers from around the country, with implications for youth workers in every environment.

R-E-S-T: The Four-Letter Word of Youth Workers?

When you think of the Sabbath, what comes to mind? If the answer is, “A work day,” then you may want to consider these thoughts about rest and its critical role in your ministry.

A Note About the Team

Dr. Jude Tiersma Watson, Associate Professor of Urban Mission and an urban youth worker herself in Los Angeles, is heading up the development of this unique self-care resource specifically tailored for the urban youth worker (though there will be principles and resources helpful for all youth workers).  Kimberly Williams, FYI author and former Oakland Mission Year director, joins Jude in the research and development of these resources.