Obstacles to Agreement

At the suggestion of Scott Cormode at Fuller, I am reading a great book called Getting Past No by William Ury.  The goal of the book is to help you negotiate difficult situations, whether that be in your business or personal life.  It contains lots of practical ideas in negotiating with others and trying to arrive at a satisfactory resolution for all involved.

I especially appreciate the 4 common obstacles to agreement Ury describes:

1. Not their idea – the other side might reject a proposal just because they didn’t think of it.
2. Unmet interests – you might not be understanding one of your counterpart’s basic interests.
3. Fear of losing face – the other side is afraid of looking bad in front of others.
4. Too much too fast – the decision might seem too big and time too short, making it easier to just say “no”.

In my experience, #4 is the most common in churches.  In families, #2 is the most common.  What do you think?  Which do you think are the most prevalent?

Tomorrow’s blog post will outline a framework to move past these and other obstacles.

©2010 Fuller Youth Institute